Wednesday 7 March 2012

Descriptive Writing in Room 16

Here is some more descriptive writing from our talented class! Come into Room 16 to see the pictures of our space aliens!


The Elemental Eye

Elemental eyes are a fascinating species of very dangerous space aliens that come from the planet Element .

The E Eyes (their nick name) look mostly like a giant eye with horns always curling in front of them. Their eye is specially armoured with acid that will burn in contact. The back of their eye is armoured with iron plates. There is also a summoner on their head that can shoot all elements .

They smell like old, dirty slugs with a rotting carcase on their heads.  E eyes sound like snakes and slugs moving.  They mostly talk through hissing and squishes. They can not talk to any type of living things.

They feel very squishy if they don’t have acid on them. Theirs bodies are dark and sometimes rainbow.

 I like this alien because he is very different from others (but I don’t think you will he is very dangerous)

By Oska


3 Eyed Lenny

Lenny has 3 eyes, 2 ears,1 nose and 4 arms. He feels gooey and squishy. Whenever you touch him you will get slime on you. He sounds like a pig and a
donkey. He smells like horse, poo and paper. He looks like a person and a pig and an alien!

He has ears that are half an egg and they are pink. He eats out of his nose and travels down to his mouth and then chews it.

I like my alien because he is funny.

Matthew


Eater of Worlds
Eater of Worlds  is  scaly  and  slimy.  His  arms  and legs are too.  He is Egyptian  as well he can shoot webs and leeches. He has  killer razor sharp venus  fly trap hands and one hand below him.   He  can  infect  the ground with his slimy feet.   He  has three eyes. On his back he has millions of spikes that are poisonous.  They paralyze you, then you freeze and he eats you!  If you manage to kill it he drops a lazer cannon .
He is from Pluto.  He is infinite years old and never dies of oldness.  He is sooooo smelly!  He makes high pitched sound waves to talk.  I like Eater of Worlds because he has very good defence.
Jack




My Alien
My Alien has 3 eyes and 3 arms on each side.  He has 15 legs and one wiggly mouth like a worm.  He has 2 ears. My alien has 7 pieces of hair.  He has 1 wobbly nose. He smells
like dirt and mud mixed up together.  My alien feels slimy and sloshy. My alien sounds like a mouse going squeak, squeak.  
I like my alien because he has 3 eyes so he can see me better.
Paloma
My Alien
My alien is a cat.  She has hairy legs.  My alien is friendly.  I like my alien because she is soft.
Nathania
My Alien
My alien is cool.  My alien has 6 legs on his head.  My alien has a giant big head.  My alien jiggles around.  I like my alien because he can fly.
Xavier
Smelly
Smelly is a yucky old dirty alien. He has ten eyes and colourful legs. He feels so slimy that if you touch him he will gobble you up.  So don’t go near him!  
He smells like yucky socks that haven’t been washed.  He sounds like a little baby crying.  He sounds like some rabbits that are nibbling their carrots.  He looks like some cabbage that I threw out last year.  He also looks like a tomato that has claws.  His mouth is like an eye.  He is selfish. 
I don’t like him because he nearly gobbled me up.
Tes

6 comments:

  1. Excellent stuff. Great descriptive language. Remember to look closely at difficult words. If in doubt look it up.

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  2. Hi Room 15, great descriptive writing. I could picture your aliens in my head because your descriptions were so detailed. Some of you are beginning to use similes in your writing which is very clever. Looking forward to reading some more of your work.

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  3. Paddy (Lotta's dad)3 April 2012 at 7:39 pm

    Great writing everyone - I loved your descriptions of the eyes Oska.

    Paddy (board of trustees)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Julie (Paloma's Mum)26 April 2012 at 7:00 pm

    What fantastic descriptive writing! I'm glad I won't get to meet any of your monsters! I love the way you have compared your aliens to unusual things, like tomatoes and eggs.

    ReplyDelete
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